I know last week I was all lovey dovey and saying how blessed I am on our anniversary....blah...blah. Just be prepared because this post
may seem like it's written by a completely different person from last week, to the point where you may wonder if someone hacked into my computer a week ago. I am also fully aware I post about this subject on a yearly basis to the point where I should probably just cut and paste and save myself the time. But on a serious note, I think this year may be the absolute worst and I am typing as fast as I can because my feelings about it are very raw right now. Yes, folks, I'm talking about Fantasy Football. Year after year, this damn game produces new converts. "Oh Cheryl, I hated it too. But I finally decided to give it a try and whaddayaknow, I'm ADDICTED!" Fabulous....there's one less person to go shopping with to avoid all the mayhem. Anyway, it's about that time and I have decided to protect myself and meet with a professional to draw up a contract of some sort (all my lawyer friends, please call me...unless, of course, you are one of THEM). If I could, and don't put anything past me at this point, it would say something like this:
1) I, Tim, shall not lock myself in the bedroom with my laptop (or any laptop belonging to CHERYL) for 10 hours on Sundays or 4 hours on Monday evenings.
2) I, Tim, will not hover around Cheryl asking to use the computer because I will furnish my own laptop from work to check scores and receive real-time updates.
3) I, Tim, will avoid texting more than 50 times per day with my league buddies. And if I must, I will try not to giggle and share the text information with Cheryl assuming she will actually care.
4) I, Tim, will give 100% of any winnings to Cheryl to use on anything she wants.
5) I, Tim, am fully aware my wife may disappear without notice for the next 17 Sundays after football season. I shall not question nor complain.
So, these five just barely scratch the surface. I think I might be on to something here....
7 comments:
I can honestly say that I have never experienced fantasy football which puts me in a position to declare that this is one of the few issues that can not be blamed on genetics. You have NO idea how great I feel about that. On the flip side, Cheryl, I sympathize with you and if this thing lasts for 17 weeks, then you have 17 weeks to develop some sort of fantasy something-or-other to take up your time for the 17 weeks that follow. Good luck!
You go girl!
we have openings in my league if you're interested!!!
OH CP I am so with you.... James is really taking a day off work for the "draft" I can't get him to take a day off for squat... Oh yeah, they want all of us women to cook fondue for them when they do it..... I was a sucker last year and those boys never came out of the garage for fondue..... we had to make plates and take it to them... WTH????
preaching to the choir here sister...drives me nuts. He even has me refreshing his scores to see who else around the league is doing what each minute. Can you change the name to Jeff in that contract as well and send over?
Too funny!!!! I like #4 the best. That way if he wins, you can go and splurge on anything you want. You may even want to do that before he wins. HeHe.
I so feel your pain. Too funny!
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